Langston Hughes wrote,
Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.
Congratulations to the winner of this year’s competition, Christian Ward.
Portrait of a lymphoma patient as shapeshifter
Sometimes, in my dreams,
I'm the gossamer bell of a jellyfish.
Other times, I like to surf
the vibrations of a house spider
trying to catch the moon flipping its face
like a coin. Perhaps, if bored,
I'll ride on a tabby, feeling the jungle
of its fur swish in my face like a scene
from Indiana Jones. Or I'll be the cornfield
cupping harvest mice as a barn owl
swoops in for the kill. These are the best ones.
I don't want to be remembered
as waking up as a basking shark
coughing up the unwanted krill of a cancerous
bloodstream, or a maybug clanging
into windows after a dose of radiotherapy.
Let me dream of being a buzz cut cloud watching
over the hills like a Star Wars force ghost.
Let me dream of being rain turning every garden
into pancake batter. Even the restless cicada
mining away the days before breaching the surface
would be fine. Anything but waking as the stick insect
of myself: whatever might use me like a violin bow,
abandon my uncertain music.
Of his poem Christian writes,
The poem draws on my experiences with Stage 4 lymphoma. The speaker longs for better days, escaping to a fantastic world where anything is possible, including shapeshifting into various creatures and embracing the depths of the imagination (including being a jellyfish and a cornfield).
The only catch is this in dreams. The speaker will have to wake up to the real world of cancer and the uncertainty that lies ahead (the “uncertain music” at the end).
I chose to use surreal imagery for the piece because I think it’s quite fitting for cancer. There’s something otherworldly about being diagnosed with a disease that leaves your life in limbo. You are neither here nor there, but in an absurdist purgatory where no-one explains the rules.
Shortlisted Poems 2025
Expecting by Caitríona O’Riordan (Dublin)
Déja vu by James Anthony (Athlone)
As you sleep, if you can by Kate Fenwick (Isle of Wight)
Two Comets in Dam City by John D. Kelly (Fermanagh)
Aill na Searrach by Nuala O’Farrell (Dublin)
Athena Lindia, Dream #3 by Patrick Lodge (UK)
When Dreams Become Reality by Maurice Devitt (Dublin)
Online Language Lesson by Karen Hodgson Pryce (Scotland)
Portrait of a lymphoma patient as a shapeshifter by Christian Ward (London)
shadow play by Milla van der Have (Netherlands)
Drawn to the Light Press 